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  • Writer's pictureJake E

Group Ride Hijacking

Take Over the World v1.0

This is where I will lay out my plans to hijack the Winston-Salem Community Bike Ride on April 12th and begin my ultimate plan of taking over the world. Don’t worry, I got permission to hijack the ride first.

definition of hijack

The first part of my plan will go something like this… The #discoveryourcity ride will start like it normally does; we’ll meet at the same time (3pm every Sunday) and the same place (Washington Perk & Provisions on Acadia Ave.) so no one will catch on to my plan. I’ll act as if nothing is different until the crowd of cyclists gathers, ready to ride, and then — I’ll announce I’m leading the ride (evil laugh). I’ll take the riders to Twin City Hive, one of the best coffee shops in Winston-Salem. Here you can get gourmet chocolates, delicious pastries from Tart Sweets, a pour-over cup of coffee made from one of about a bajillion coffee bean choices, or meet Daniel.

winston salem group bicycle ride

Daniel is the Founder and CEO of The Coffee Co-Mission — a coffee roaster with a social mission — and a local of Winston-Salem. He’ll greet the group with samples and explain more about how they source beans to fight against poverty.

After I’ve completed the first part of my plan, I’ll lead the ride back to Washington Perk where I’ll engage in the final mission: Buy a Beer, Get a Raffle Ticket. I’ll make it seem like an innocent $2 bottled beer special, then hit them with a raffle ticket every time they purchase a beer. The lucky raffle winner will get a gift certificate to use at The Perk and no one will ever know what happened…

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